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Guide to self fisting

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At a recent conference I...

Being inside of your partner, or having your partner inside of you, creates incredible intimacy. Plus, because fisting must be done Guide to self fisting and carefully, it gives partners a chance to really connect.

At a recent conference I attended for sexuality professionals, one of the vendors was giving out pins. Fisting is one of those acts that queer folks have been engaging in for ages. It's recently gone a bit more mainstream. But despite gaining greater visibility, vaginal fisting still sounds impossibly extreme to some. This is one of the principals behind any penetrative sex act.

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Also, anything that must be done slowly and carefully gives partners a chance to really connect. So, fisting packs a double whammy. Fisting can become goal oriented.

And being goal oriented about sex is a sure fire way to be disappointed. Let fisting be a journey, not a destination. Here's a step by step guide for those who want to give it a try. Like any sex act, fisting comes with some risks you should be aware of. To get the lowdown on exactly what those risks are, I talked to a couple of experts.

According to Evelin Dacker, MD: On the rare side is a hematoma or Guide to self fisting of the vagina. Air embolus is very rare, but also possible. Probably the most common would be a urinary tract infection. There are of course the usual risks of infections which could lead to [ pelvic inflammatory disease ] since so much more pressure is being put on the cervix, as well as STIs and also group B strep, E.

Coli, and even staphylococcus. Despite these potential risks, Vera Levitt Casey Guide to self fisting Sexdoula. Entire humans come out of vaginas - even hang out in there for extended periods of time - fisting is way less traumatic. Micro tears can lead to infection if bacteria is present, but gloves and lube and well trimmed fingernails prevent most of this.

And that leads us nicely into a discussion of supplies. Gloves are great for any hand sex, but especially for fisting.

Even with well trimmed nails and freshly washed hands, bacteria can be present. Gloves add an extra degree of safety to keep scratches and tears from happening. They also help keep bacteria from Guide to self fisting into those tears if they are present. Gloves also smooth the edges of your hands and nails. Make sure you get gloves that fit snugly, without wrinkles.

Nitrile gloves are great, especially for those with a latex allergy. Next up is lube. That means no glycerine, parabens, petroleum, propylene glycol, or chlorhexidine. All bodies are different. The same body is different on different days.

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Before you even begin, the person being fisted should be very aroused. Be ready to slow down, or take breaks, as Guide to self fisting. Get ready to commit some time and get your space ready. Have towels down on the bed, have your gloves, lube, and toys within reach, and have a glass of water nearby too.

Play some music or light some candles - whatever feels sexy to you.

This is the first in...

The fister should wash their hands and scrub their nails even if gloves are being used. Make sure jewelry is removed from the fingers and wrist. The person being fisted should go to the bathroom and empty their bladder.

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The feeling of fullness that fisting provides can feel like having to pee, and so can G-spot stimulation. Having an empty bladder helps set the mind at ease and keep things more comfortable. Do whatever you normally do when getting sexy with your partner. Kiss, massage and play for a while to connect and set the mood. You want the body receiving fisting to be very warmed up. If the person being fisted can have multiple orgasms, then having orgasms as warm-up can be great.

Either way, plan to spend a lot of time Guide to self fisting vulva massage, clitoral touch, and G-spot stimulation - depending on the desires of the person being touched. Wait until the person is ready. Then, start with one or two fingers. Some people like clitoral stimulation along with penetration and some find it distracting. Be sure to ask about this.

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The person being fisted might want to touch themselves or use toys. For many people, having a vibrator on their clit is a great accompaniment to fisting as well. Checking in as you go, keep adding fingers. Get four fingers, up to the knuckle and then hang out there for a while.

The next step is the trickiest. When everyone is ready, tuck your thumb in, try to elongate your fist and minimize your knuckles, and apply light pressure. You want to focus on collapsing your hand as much as possible.

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So, the ring finger and pinky should collapse inwards as well. Twist side to side a bit, to work your fist in. You might not get here on your first try, or ever.

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See what feels best, but many people like a slight upward motion, aiming for the G-spot area. Be very mindful not to run into the cervix. And remember to enjoy the feeling of being fully inside your partner! Keep checking in about what they need, and what additional kinds of stimulation might feel good. Focus on subtle motions, as this is already pretty intense all on its own.


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